ANY-WHERE but here. any. freaking. where. for once, i’d just like to be free.
why is it every time you care more about a person’s wellbeing than your own they inevitably turn it down by effectively slapping you in the face.
the same question ad infinitum: why do i even bother.
because i care too damn much.
I can no longer sleep well without you
sometimes i wonder about all this, wonder if it’s possible that it might work - because you never truly know if you’ve succeeded till you’re at the end, and it scares the hell out of me, to think that this could go one of two ways. maybe we’re standing on the same path at the end, or paths diverge again like they always do. I believe that all futures and all pasts are happening at the same time, constantly, and that somewhere, everything till the end of the universe has already been determined. and what scares me even more is not knowing whether we truly make the right choices, or it’s just the universe making sports of us all.
when we’re in bed wrapped around one another and cocooned inside the covers everything acquires a delicate balance and peace, and just in those moments i feel infinitely secure and even fleetingly happy, but what if none of this is meant to last? these days i feel like i’m living in a constant fog of melancholy, and i’m so afraid of losing myself in it something else happens.